I finally have a second to update some of this week's details. I have tried to post updates on FB, but it's hard to get all the details on there.
K arrived Tues night and I was a bit worried bc she only took a few sips of water in the van and didn't want to eat dinner. Once we finally got home, she perked up at the cat and very clearly said, "I like cat!" Then she went to bed. She (well, all the kids) went to bed a little after 9 and I had to wake her up at 9:45 the next morning. There is a 7 (I think) hour time difference, plus travelling for 20-something hours, and you can imagine how tired she was. I hated to wake her up!
Once awake, she got dressed and then sat on her bed working on mazes and looking at books. I tried to lure her out with breakfast, but she didn't want to eat anything. She did gulp down some milk, and then went straight back to her room. She was so quiet, the kids were being quiet! I knew she needed a swimsuit, but I had wanted to wait a day or two before we went to a store, since sometimes that can be overwhelming. But since she wouldn't come out, I figured if I got us all out of the house, she'd HAVE to come out. So I told her 'machina' (Russian for car) and she nodded and got her shoes. We just went in to Target and I gave her 2 swimsuits to choose from, and she held hands with Ava and/or Jadyn the whole time. Once we got home, it was lunch time (which she did eat) and then we all watched a movie. She wowed the kids with her crazy jump rope skills and demonstrated how she can stand on her head (with no wall). They thought she was awesome.
My mom, sister, and her two little kids came over for a bit. We had baked brownies earlier, so we all enjoyed those. After they all left, Jadyn got really upset because she forgot to give my sister a card she had made, and K was very concerned that she was crying so hard. She patted her head and stood there with us, til she stopped crying. It was sweet.
Thursday I had promised that we would go swimming. Then of course, it rained. All day. So we hung out at the house and played games and hung around. She was still being really quiet, but she wasn't in her room all the time. We did venture out to a friend's house to pick blueberries. She was a trooper picking in the drizzle and ate so many, I thought she might be sick later. That was our big entertainment for the day til Gabe got home and set up the Wii. That helped her come out of her shell a tiny bit more.
Today we went one way to meet a friend and take his Russian speaking daughter with us to go the opposit way to the eye doctor. {K for some reason did not bring her glasses. She said she forgot, you can tell she really needed them, so maybe she was trying to be 'cool' and not have glasses? Who knows.} She quickly picked out 2 frames (they had a good deal for 2 sets and an exam) and then we had the exam. There were moments it was comical. The teen that was with us has been in America since March '10, so she was still alittle shaky on a few English words. But she did great. K was terrified and stiff and Z stayed calm the whole time, even though it had to have been awkward and stressful at times. I still had my three kids there, but they all love Z, so they enjoyed reading to her and sitting in her lap. Z stayed very calm with them and helped me keep them in line. Plus, she was great company for me. She was easy to talk to. She's very funny and helped keep everything 'light'. It was nice to be able to ask K what she thought of things and what her favorite color is and that sort of thing.....She was SO relieved when we got out of there, though. She was very cooperative, but you could tell she was scared and stiff.
Gabe picked the glasses up on his way home and she was very excited when he got home. She gave us hugs and said thanks to each of us. Then she got all nervous and put them away, and I said, "Uh? K! Glasses!" and laughed and she got the purple ones out and put them on. She was shaking, and after the initial telling her how good she looked, I was glad the kids didn't say anything else and we just had dinner as usual.
There was about an hour this afternoon where she was talking and running around with the kids and using English and Russian and laughing a lot. I hope I see that side of her more often. You can tell she has no confidence at ALL. She keeps her face blank and eyes down a lot of the time. It's very sad. She is also very artistic, and enjoys crafts- even playdoh and coloring. We are trying to constantly encourage her at every turn.
Tomorrow will be the first full day Gabe has been home since K arrived. She doesn't seem to fear him, or hate men like so many girls in her situation do, and that has been a relief. Oh, and tonight she showered without being told and her clothes from today went into the hamper instead of back in the drawer. I have learned that the simple act of putting clothes in the hamper is a huge act of trust in most cases. In most orphanages, they have shared clothes. So if you like something, you don't take it off. You wash it in the sink at night, if at all. I took some of her dirty clothes out of her drawer and washed them and returned them before she knew they were gone (I think) a couple of hours later. I wanted to SHOW her that I can be trusted....that I wasn't going to give her clothes to one of mine; that her things were her things and I would really give them back. Clean, even. So when I saw her clothes in the hamper, I had a tiny party in my heart.
It's only been 3 days. There is generally a 'honeymoon' period and then the tantrums or defiance can/will start. But I feel like we have covered a lot of ground for 3 days, even though there is so much more to go! Please keep praying, for her and for us and for the girls. There are good things happening, big and little, and it's been great to watch it all.
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